Hanging in there

There are times that being a mom of three is completely overwhelming. Times like tonight - I'm trying to get dinner ready, Luci is screaming for me, Cohen and Lili have just discovered that toilet paper plus water equals goo, and goo is super-fun to throw at walls... the dishes need doing, I can't remember the last time I washed the floors, I've washed the same load of laundry 3 times because I keep forgetting about it overnight... I know that there are still size 2 clothes in Lili's closet and I really need to go through everything and clear it out... There is meat in the fridge that is waiting to be frozen, and chances are it'll go bad before I get to it. Dinner consists of Cohen refusing to eat, Lili spilling her food everywhere, and Luci crying. My plate is empty but I have no memory of eating... oh wait, that's because I actually haven't - I served the kids and forgot mine.

It's 9pm, and I'm so tired I want to cry. And this was a supposedly EASY day! Just my 3 kids! In my defence, it's Ian's last night shift, which means it's the last of 4 days by myself.

Sigh. This also means that tomorrow I have all 6 kids while Ian sleeps. I am trying to tell myself that a good nights' sleep will do wonders. Problem is - I'm noticing lately that my milk supply is waning. Seriously freaking me out. I'm nowhere near ready to stop nursing, and so I have to increase my supply... and to do that, I need to nurse Luci every 1.5 - 2 hours. Which means, a good nights sleep is nowhere in my horizon.

Funny, one thing parenthood teaches you, it's how to live in the moment. Because even as I typed the above, my brain was reminding me that before any of that, I have a long, hot bath in my immediate future.

Amen to that.

Yesterday was such a terrific day - I took Cohen and Lili to the movies, Ian got the groceries (well, he got some of them. small price to pay for not having to get them myself, i guess)... i came home, enjoyed a healthy dinner with my kids (almost no complaining from Cohen, miraculous)... and then we all snuggled up on the sofa, me and the three kids, and watched cartoons until bedtime. I remember thinking at the time - I wouldn't trade this for the world.

Today, I'd probably trade it for a stiff drink.

But that's how it goes - good days and bad days. Thank goodness Ian has the next 4 days off... I vow to do the following:
1 - go out for drinks with the girls
2 - go swimming, and spend at least 30 minutes in the hottub while i'm there
3 - take a walk, just me and my ipod.

those are my lofty goals for the week!

for now, hot bath ++ green tea + trashy novel calls!